Pain Is A Great Teacher
I haven’t blogged in one year. WOW! As a long-time blogger, that’s a huge break.
In January I had a devastating fall in my home. I broke my shoulder, damaged the ulnar nerve in my elbow, sustained a concussion, bruises from head to toe, sprained and fractured my wrist, lost all use of my right arm and hand––of course I’m right-handed. Of course! ––and was bedridden for over 3 months. It was a traumatic injury that I am still, and as of writing this on September 1st 2024, going to physical therapy twice a week to regain full use of my hand. It’s painful, but worth it.
During my bedridden days, my husband had to feed me. I HATED being a helpless burden.
Anyways … I couldn’t even hold my phone, imagine that! I was very upset about losing writing time. And though the prospect of working on my full-length novel projects was too overwhelming for my concussed brain, I had to do something. Also, at that point, I could only use my forefinger on my bruised left hand to press a button, or anything else. My right hand was completely useless and in pain. The picture here shows how my arm swelled up and had black bruises from shoulder to fingertips. It looks more like an elephant trunk than a human arm. But human it was, and it was mine.
I was getting a bit depressed (pain meds didn’t help) about not writing, which I also realized was projecting my fear of having just almost died, onto the writing that would never be finished. My fate was linked with my trauma and created a profoundly sad state of mind. And trust me, that’s not a good foundation for healing––but only I could lift my spirits.
Unable to use my right hand––any movement reduced me to agony and tears––I managed to prop my phone on a pillow next to me and turn on my voice technology. I spoke into the phone and texted myself bits and pieces of story ideas and poems, trying to reawaken and spark my groggy brain cells. Though some days I could only work this way for 5-10 minutes without dropping into complete exhaustion, it saved me. I felt a sense of purpose and was able to stay in touch with my writing spirit, which is everything. Feeling a sense of purpose is vital in healing from anything.
During those months I managed to write several poems. I sent them to my e-mail (via text) to edit and format later when I was sure I would be able to type again. Later came five months later in early June. I formatted them and organized a manuscript of poetry, along with professional art, and voila! A small book of poetry was born from my trauma and a desperate desire to heal—heart, body, mind, and soul.
I am now querying that book to publishers. I am pleased to say that one poem has just been published in the Penn Journal of Arts and Sciences Literary journal.
Please give it a read, my poem is titled, Maiden, Mother, Crone https://www.upennjournalarts.org/writing/maiden-mother-crone-c44gn-nwrbj
They also did a lovely interview with me, take a look at my featured profile Mindy Halleck — Penn Journal of Arts and Sciences (upennjournalarts.org)
Another poem titled, Unraveling was published in the Edmonds News, Poet’s Corner: Unraveling – My Edmonds News Though that poem was written before my fall.
What has this taught me about life? Well, pain is one of the greatest teachers we have. We learn a lot about ourselves, our resolve, our desire to heal, and mental as well as physical fortitude. I’ve lived through cancer, and had numerous other things happen to me but this injury has been the most traumatic, soul shaking experience. What it did was focus me in a way I had not been focused since my brothers died two years ago. It reminded me that time is of the essence and if I wanted to get anything done before I too, check out, I’d better get busy.
It also made me focus on my intentions, for example, what do I want to say in my work? I am concentrating on writing about the lives of women—ordinary and extraordinary alike—and the choices they make. I desire to delve into stories and poems that are instructional from my Crone-age perspective and encouraging for younger generations, passing on the wisdom of this old female warrior who has gone before. Pain has taught me to embrace my unique voice on these topics. Afterall, no one else has my lived experience or my voice.
I’m back to life now, gardening (short stints), and back to writing and querying. Oh, and smiling, I am definitely back to smiling.
Don’t wait for pain to be your teacher. What are you writing, why are you writing, and how can you tap into your unique voice?
Your message has been sent
Mindy Meyers-Halleck 
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